Yep, I'm still alive!

Goodness, it has been a while since I last posted.  I thought of just wiping everything and starting over, but I have some pretty awesome posts and motivational things on this blog, so I decided that I will just start over, but keep the posts!  My life has changed quite a bit this last year, I lost my 'full' time job and had to find a new one (owner retired and closed his location) I do like my new job, and it's still working with animals.  I dabbled in selling Park Lane Jewelry for a while, but because of my introverted personality and anxiety issues, I decided it wasn't for me at this time.  I am still battling the battle of the bulge and I would love NOTHING more than to get rid of it.  I am sick of splitting my scrub pants because of my thunder thighs, sick of being a chunky monkey, sick of being out of shape, sick of not having any energy....so 2012 it is!  I am going to watch what I eat portion wise, and try to drink more water than I normally do....I am a Diet Coke addict!  I drink AT LEAST a 2 liter per day...and would like to exchange that for water.  My goal by the end of 2012, is to lost at least 50#, which is about 1# a week, which isn't 'out of range' if I focus right.

My husband just recently had a couple of surgeries and the Dr really lectured him on his weight as well so we are definitely both going to be on this journey.  Stay tuned for updates, have to go finish 'FLYing' as we have company coming over tomorrow.  Have a great night!

My starting weight 233.4#  My 'goal' is 150# (we will see how I feel/look when I get there), but for now I am working to about 175#  I haven't been under 200# in a LONG LONG time (about 6 or 7 years for longer than about 2 days lol), so I am super psyched for this goal and I KNOW I can do it!

Stress..Stress...GO AWAY!

On Plan: Water: Exercise:
***Warning....I'm kind of verbose today*** :) Woot Woot! No frownie faces yet! I have had such an incredible amount of stress this week, I think it's a test to see if I will break my diet. Today I broke down in the bathroom at work and cried for 30 minutes. The business that I love and have put a lot of effort and my life into is struggling to stay above water. It breaks my heart. We are trying to turn things around but it's looking very bleak. Then we have a little adoption kitten who was pulled from the shelter with a fractured leg, we surgically repaired it (put a metal pin in it) and about 5 days after we got him he started getting sick, he has a respiratory infection, but it's extremely severe and with pneumonia, so he has been on deaths bed for a week. Here is his picture, these were taken the day we got him before his surgery. He has been severely dehydrated and hasn't eaten on his own since last Friday...we are giving him subcutaneous fluids, medications for his infection/pneumonia and putting drops up his nose to clear it out so he can smell so he can eat. He is also on a heating pad. He is improving today though, I thought we were going to lose him yesterday, he went hypothermic on us (temp 95) and was barely responsive. But he's looking better today, and even purred. Poor little guy has lost a lot of weight. Sorry for going on about him...animals are my life....next to my husband....I have a lot of compassion for special needs animals.




I was so depressed about the business, and the kitten, I was having an incredibly hard time, Hubby told me that I should pray to help take some of the 'doomsday' feelings away, and I did, it helped throughout the day. Now mind you I am the one who served 18 months on a religious mission, not my hubby, he is a convert to our church, and he is such a strong man, he is always the one who has to remind me to talk to my Heavenly Father. I was able to stay more focused on positive aspects of the business and get work done better, I was efficient this afternoon...depsite everyone deciding to show up at once right before my lunch break. I am quite proud of the fact that I was able to stay on plan as usually at the first sign of stress, I start eating badly. So far so good. (It helps that we are broke beyond broke right now so I can't rush to walmart to pick up junk food.....lol) I think I have 2 more days on the detox drink, my tongue is still slightly white, that's what they say to use as an indicator. I am proud of myself though instead of coming home and sitting on the couch with my laptop I did some cleaning in the kitchen and organized the 'dog' corner (where we keep all their stuff etc.)
Food Intake: B Green Smoothie, Detox Drink, 1 Apple
L: Detox Drink, Green Apple, Garden Salad w/tuna, carrots w/low carb dressing
D: Detox Drink, Garden Salad (Grilled Chicken, Cucumbers, Olives, Cheese, Romaine Lettuce) w/low carb dressing, Steamed Broccoli
Snacks: Green Bell Peppers, Cucumbers, Detox Drink, Celery
**Detox Drink Lemon Juice/Maple Syrup/Cayenne Pepper
**Green Smoothie: Parsley, Ginger, Pineapple, Honey, Water, Splenda
Exercise: 30 Minutes Walking with my dog

Why I love my husband

What a wonderful conversation to start off the day ;) This is an AIM Conversation. Just gotta love his 'kissing' up don'tcha? Makes me feel not so bad for taking a butter knife to my laptop keyboard the other day and popping off the spacebar key (trying to get the piece of food out from under it)....this is coming from my hubby who is a computer geek by trade.

6:57:20 AM) heather Love you
(6:57:32 AM) rob love you too.
(6:57:36 AM) rob oh dso I love you
(6:57:51 AM) rob you are the bestestestest wife in the whole world.
(6:58:05 AM) heather why?
(6:58:14 AM) rob the most caring, kind hearted, loving, UNDERSTANDING person in the world.
(6:59:13 AM) rob and you love your husband to no end and would be happy, near estatic to do anything for him.
(7:00:52 AM) heather What do you need/want?
(7:01:05 AM) heather ;-)
(7:01:11 AM) rob I need $20
(7:01:19 AM) heather What now :-*
(7:01:19 AM) rob I can pay you back when I get paid
(7:01:42 AM) rob um, I need you to stop at walmart and pick up a new keyboard.
(7:02:10 AM) rob cause um, I won't have time to fix yours until this weekend..
(7:02:25 AM) rob O:-)
(7:02:38 AM) rob it was an accident
(7:03:05 AM) heather What did you do?
(7:04:17 AM) rob um, I went to um set some ice on your desk, and um there was a cup there that um I kinda set there the other day so I um wouldn't knock it over, and well um it kinda fell over and um emptied itself into your keyboard, the um entire glass.
(7:05:17 AM) heather So you took it upon yourself to have a heather moment did ya?
(7:05:46 AM) heather: Speaking of which....my brother is harassing me about his puters
(7:05:57 AM) rob and see we um payed like um $20 for them so um I thought you could pick one um up and I would clean the old one um on the weekend and have it as um like um an extra in case um heatherism strikes again.

Rescue Me

Today was a VERY busy day for me. I got up early (7am on day off), immediately got to work, I made the laundry soap for my work, my dad is VERY excited about it. Then I went to walmart and picked up a couple of essentials. Came home put them away, sat on the couch and vegged for a bit catching up on emails, reading blogs etc then I went and cleaned out my car which was in DESPERATE need of needing cleaning. Then I drove to meet my new dog. Her name is Lilly (*subject to change as that is already the name of my guinea pig---considering Tawny or Shellie--Shellie is the name of a Golden Retriever that comes to the vet I work at that was missing for 4 years and found because of a Microchip --You can read about Shellie the missing Golden Retriever HERE) It was an awesome experience when the shelter called me to verify who the dog belonged to I seriously got goose bumps! Lilly reminds me of Shellie before Shellie went missing --her physical features etc) Anyways that's besides the point, Lilly is a 7 month old Golden Retriever who has a shoulder condition (Osteochondritis Dissecans), which is basically she has a piece of cartilage that has detached from the bone so causing her pain. Her owners due to the financial crisis of the economy can't afford surgery (which is normally $1700.00 PER shoulder) but didn't want to put her to sleep so they put her up for adoption on a local classifieds site. I saw her ad and felt a 'nagging' to rescue her. My dad is a Veterinarian so the surgery won't be a problem, and he gives me a nice discount as well. Lilly is a sweetie, she is only 7 months old yet is very well trained, she sits & waits for her dinner and waits until you release her to start eating it. After she has her surgeries (one in the next week or so) then the other shoulder in about 4-6 weeks) and has recovered she will make an excellent exercise companion. Right now she weighs about 53#, she is probably going to be around 70# full grown.

Then as I'm coming home from picking her up, my hubby called and wanted me to go pick up his pills from Walmart as well as take care of rent, then texts me that his head was killing him, so I offered to bring him his pills (blood pressure ones he's been out of for a week thanks to an idiot Physicians Assistant). So I took him his pills and we enjoyed a few minutes on the bench outside his work, it was nice. Then I came home did a few things on my to do list, made some dinner, got my exercise in and am just about to head to bed.

Happy Anniversary to me!

It's our anniversary today! 4 Glorious years. It's my normal day off and Rob was lucky enough to get the day off so we could spend it together. We spent the day snuggled on the couch watching TV, and we had homemade pizza for lunch, are having Steaks w/baked potatoes me--> Loaded Broccoli instead, salad for dinner. We are going out to eat at Outback Steakhouse on Monday (Thanks to my sisters: Jen--she gave me a gift certificate for making Bandanas for her, and thanks Lara as she gave me some $$ for printing her up some stuff.). We may try to see a movie as well. I have attached some of my favorite pictures from our wedding....not all of my favorites though :) I was about 160# at my wedding size 10 dress. I felt really good, but probably could have lost a little more and been happy.

Talking About it on Tuesday

Today, I'm beat, I went home early from work yesterday worked on the house some, made some more Kitty Krazies Catnip toys, and then Rob set up my new laptop (which we only ordered like a month and a half ago (valentines day to be exact) BEFORE Rob's hours were cut). It FINALLY came yesterday so he spent the evening getting Windows put on it, and then Installing Linux on it as the Operating System. I will use a virtual machine for windows as I HATE using Windows. Anyways we watching some movies, I was tired but didn't want to go to bed without him and he was in 'the mode' to finish it, he told me 1/2 an hour so I laid on the couch and fell asleep, woke up when my alarm on my phone went off this morning at 5:00am and Rob was STILL up messing with my laptop. He was 'obsessing' he says. Goodness somedays....So I sent him to bed! He has to work today the bugger! I am going out to the Texas Roadhouse this evening with my family, my sister is taking us all out to dinner for her 'monthly' Family dinner. We take turns doing Family Dinners, and since she's still single (39) she spoils EVERYONE and always pays for everyone to go out to eat at a restaurant, inlaws included.

As for the diet front, I need another kick in the pants to get me started. My cousin gave me her mountain bike like 2 years ago and it is still sitting at work, I SO need to take it home to start using, that's one exercise I don't mind doing is biking. Now that my living room is clean I have no excuses NOT to do the WATP Dvd's I've been using the excuse "My office" is messy I can't do it in there, there isn't any room. So now that I have ended 'CHAOS' (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) on at least my main level...no more excuses! I was VERY excited as my Visiting Teachers from Church want to come over and for the first time in a long time, I don't have to make excuses because I'm too embarassed about the 'cluttered' house. YEAH! Feels so good, it is definitely motivating to have a nice clean house (main level only so far) and to be able to come home and not stress about it, not sit on couch 'thinking' I should get up and clean as it's clean. I've decided that Wednesdays are going to be my "Home Blessing Hour" where I go through and sweep/mop, vacuum dust etc, but you are supposed to be able to get it all done in an hour, which should be NO problem if I continue to "FLY" each day. I think the Flylady thing is definitely keeping me more on track with the diet as well.

My hubby made me cry today :)

With PRIDE today! I know this is probably dumb...but I am SO incredibly proud of him! Let me explain, he decided last night he is going to do Slim Fast bars for breakfast, eat a healthy lunch and then Shakes for dinner (he is home at 10:00pm and doesn't want to have to digest too much at night). Anyways, he is going to do this till the end of next week beginning of the following week when he can get in to start the Firstline Weightloss program with the Dr. (Have to wait till his payday)

So today he kept telling me all throughout the day (on chat) how he started with a shake for breakfast, had a ham n swiss wrap for lunch (homemade), then got hungry for munchies, had to go upstairs to use the bathroom at work, and there were white powdered donuts in the vending machine that were 'calling' his name, and he has 2 friends at work who are 'helping' him with his weight loss, so he figured that he could eat them upstairs and 'no one' would know. Then he thought to himself "I would know" they had sunflower seeds up there, but they didn't appeal to him so he came downstairs to the vending machines and had Almonds. He didn't have any soda's today (not that he's the soda addict like me), but he had water instead, 3 mugs full, and some Crystal Light Lemonade, he's a lemonade addict.

Then he got off early tonight (7pm) and I was going to Walmart to pick him up some shakes, he wasn't going to go with me as he wanted to just veg, then decided to go, and normally he just sits in the car cause he's hurting or just doesn't want to go it, he went in with me, and picked out some Slim Fast Bars, they didn't really have a lot he could have as he's allergic to chocolate (wish it were that easy to HAVE to stay away from it), oranges, strawberries and regular milk (has to have skim) due to his asthma, he can have them but if his asthma/breathing is acting up those foods trigger it and make it worse. But he did pick out some meal bars and the muffin meal bars, then while I went and grabbed some skim milk he went to the produce section and picked out some oranges, bananas and red apples.

He is trying so hard, and was even 'the bold' one tonight about having a healthy dinner. I'm so proud of him, I am crying even as I type this.